5. The Crazies (2010)
I have a confession: I’ve never seen George Romero’s 1973 film The Crazies. Does that make me a blasphemer? Maybe, but that’s for the courts to decide. I have seen Breck Eisner‘s 2010 remake, however, and I can tell you that it rules. A plane crashes in a rural Iowa town unleashing a military virus that turns the locals into lunatic killers. The townspeople become struck with paranoia, unable to know whom they can trust and whom they can’t. Eventually, that doesn’t matter because the military comes in to clean things up.
The Crazies works because it seems very plausible, even more so now in our current political climate. Would you be surprised if our government accidentally unleashed chemical warfare on us? Me neither. (Chris Coffel)
4. Piranha 3D (2010)
I believe it was Godard who said all you need to make a movie is a swarm of prehistoric piranhas and teenagers on spring break. This is a sentiment Alexandre Aja (the only director to land two spots on our list of the best horror remakes — and he co-wrote and produced a third!) knows well and a fact he utilizes to its full potential in his remake of Joe Dante’s 1978 cult classic.
Piranha 3D is a rip-roaring horror comedy with carnage to spare. It’s bloody, bombastic, and unabashedly ridiculous. This is a film that never takes itself too seriously and is all the better for it. And, naturally, it delivers a feast for the senses in the form of bloodthirsty piranhas. What more could you ask for? (Anna Swanson)
3. Evil Dead II (1987)
Sam Raimi‘s 1981 original The Evil Dead contains a streak of black humor, but it’s more of a straight horror movie than a comedy. The follow-up — arguably both a sequel and a remake — sees Raimi combine his love of The Three Stooges and scary movies to make the ultimate splatstick nightmare. It feels more like the movie Raimi and company had always wanted to make at the time, and the increased budget allows for much better special effects and ambitious set pieces.
While the results are hilarious, the film doesn’t lose any of the menacing edge that made the first movie such a groundbreaking hit either. Evil Dead II is wild and relentless, with laughing household ornaments and severed hands among the many ghoulish delights that add to Ash’s torment. (Kieran Fisher)
2. The Blob (1988)
Now, I’m not saying goop makes every film better. But I am saying that this amount of goop makes a film about goop better. The original 1958 version of The Blob is a playful if innocuous B-movie about a malevolent meteor wreaking havoc in small-town America. It’s all very terrifying in theory: a flesh-eating alien pile of goo, growing larger and bloodier with each victim. In execution, the film defaults to an oddball fun-factor that, to its credit, is what sets the original apart from the more self-serious B-movie fare.
And we should be so grateful because, without that upbeat jam-colored gelatin, we wouldn’t have the 1988 remake. And that’d be a shame indeed. Chuck Russell’s titular blob doesn’t just crawl, it shoots out of corpses, sucks people down drain pipes, and scurries improbably fast across ceilings. It is tongue-in-cheek body horror that didn’t come to play nice. The remake isn’t just gleefully over-the-top, it raises the stakes with improved special effects that impress the horror and hunger of this Jell-O pudding from beyond the stars. (Meg Shields)
1. Evil Dead (2013)
Odds are you’ve already read a few controversial and/or outrageous takes in our list of the best horror remakes, so here’s one more. Not only is Fede Alvarez‘s Evil Dead the best of the bunch, but it’s also the best of the Evil Dead films. Yeah yeah, it’s all subjective, but also, I’m right. Raimi’s films are comedies, and while there’s nothing wrong with a good horror-comedy, the prioritizing of zany slapstick and gory silliness just can’t compete with the purely visceral horror that Alvarez delivers.
The film’s copious gore and bloodletting aren’t fun in the traditional sense and instead mesmerizes in its visual splendor, technical perfection, and terror-inducing presence. This is a film where we feel the violence rather than merely witness it. From the bodily carnage (that tongue slice!) to the demonic transformations, this is a gloriously oppressive watch that eschews the slow burn usually associated with dread to instead pair it with fleshy renderings and liberal sprays of crimson pain.
The cast delivers across the board as well, but it’s the always fantastic Jane Levy who carries the brunt of the horror. While Raimi’s characters, outside of Ash, are forgettable, Levy’s Mia is someone we quickly come to care for. The more she suffers, the more we suffer, and her transformation into a pained and pain-dealing hellspawn delivers horror that’s both physical and emotional. This is not just the good stuff; it’s the best stuff. (Rob Hunter)
Related Topics: 31 Days of Horror Lists, Horror
