90. Gintars
Season 6, Episode 10
Everyone in the squad have their own unique ways of connecting with the Captain, and for Amy, it’s nerding the fuck out over forsenic scientist Dr. Ronald Yee (Reggie Lee). But while I may prefer to watch Yee and his defective blood-smelling flies, the heart of this episode belongs to Charles Boyle who is faced with an impossible scenario: what to do when his adopted son’s father tracks him down. Besides Hitchcock and Scully, Boyle is frequently (and enthusiastically) the butt of many Nine-Nine jokes, so it’s always effective when the character is reminded just how great he really is. That said, the million dollar joke of the episode goes to the titular Gintars (Ike Barinholtz) and his totally-not-a-scam clothing company GAP. Just, you know, pronounced with a long A sound rather than a short one.
89. Manhunter
Season 7, Episode 1
The main goal of the Season Seven premiere is to not only remind us about what happened at the end of Season Six, but also lay out many of the narrative threads we’ll follow for the rest of the season. We’re reminded that the squad is in flux, Captain Holt has been demoted down the chain of command to a traffic cop, while Jake and Amy (Should we call them Jamy?) are trying to have a child. In the episode, we see Holt struggling in his new role relinquishing leadership over to Jake and Charles as they hunt for a shooter connected to the assassination attempt of a local city council representative. While the episode is solid on laughs, it’s also not exactly remarkable either outside of introducing us to Debbie Fogle, played by Vanessa Bayer, Holt’s traffic cop partner. She’s one of the best guest stars the show’s had and breathes life into the beginning of this season.
88. Pilot
Season 1, Episode 1
A pilot episode is tricky to rank because while it can’t be representative of the series as a whole (since the characters grow so much with each season), it should establish the sandbox that we’ll be playing in for years to come. And there is no better starting point to understanding the tone of this show than the first lines of Brooklyn Nine-Nine. “This job is eating me alive. Spent all the years trying to be the good guy. The man in the white hat.” Jake monologues with an overly dramatic gravely monotone. He stares motionlessly into the camera. “I’m not becoming like them, I am them.” Amy breaks his daze, “What are you doing weirdo?” As ten mirror images of Jake appear on ten for sale televisions behind him, ‘I’m doing the best speech from Donnie Brasco!”
In this first 30 seconds, we get lampooning of cop-drama tropes, a bait-and-switch joke that would be the backbone of some of the show’s funniest moments, and we get to see the nerdy exuberance of Jake, a guy who may have primarily become a cop because he loves their movies. Creators Daniel J. Goor and Michael Schur have such a strong understanding of what they want their core group of characters to represent from the first episode that nothing in the Pilot feels like a betrayal of who they will become over the next five seasons. Sure Jake may be even more annoyingly extra in these first seasons, but it’s because they wanted to highlight his emotional maturity and growth as a focal point of the show. Brooklyn Nine-Nine is a show that is very intentional and extremely well planned, and this Pilot episode just proves that.
87. White Whale
Season 5, Episode 21
With ‘White Whale’ showing up at the tail end of season five, I only hope that means that what was established in this episode will be further fleshed out in the seasons to come. The A plot of the story revolves around Rosa and Amy tracking down an old perp who escaped custody from their early days. Amy and Rosa are a duo that the show doesn’t really utilize together often, and I hope they continue to build on this past history that we haven’t really learned about until now. Also, in classic Brooklyn Nine-Nine humor, the fact that perp Sergio Mandera smells like a British Garden to be hilariously esoteric.
86. The Therapist
Season 6, Episode 11
BROOKLYN NINE-NINE — “The Therapist” Episode 608 — Pictured: (l-r) David Paymer as Dr. William Tate, Andy Samberg as Jake Peralta — (Photo by: Vivian Zink/NBC)
If you’re reading this and have ever thought, “Should I go to therapy?”, let me tell you: you should. Sure, it’s incredibly difficult to be emotionally open with a stranger – something Jake expresses throughout this episode – but like Jake, once you’ve felt the relief that comes from talking about what’s happening in your brain, you’ll realize why it’s helped so many others. That’s, of course, if your therapist isn’t a potential criminal like David Paymer at the center of the episode. But this story goes back to what I think is Jake’s primary role in the show: to be a conduit for positive change in stereotypically masculine roles. Men have been told to suck up their emotions forever, and with episodes like this that show traditionally strong archetypal men being emotionally vulnerable, we can continue to break down antiquated gender constructs.
85. The Pontiac Bandit Returns
Season 2, Episode 10
While this isn’t the best Doug Judy episode, I appreciate the doubling down on furthering his and Jakes loving, Heat-esque dynamic. But we also get incredible cameos from Stephen Root and Sandra Bernhardt! But, if I’m being honest, it’s this episodes button that clenches its spot. After taking down Giggle Pig and her task force being a success, we see the perennial thickety exterior of Rosa Diaz melt into a big goofy grin, a mixture of relief and elation for a job well done. It’s pretty dang adorbs.
84. Charges and Specs
Season 1, Episode 22
Brooklyn Nine-Nine shirks my distaste for ‘in media res’ by twisting the trope on its head and leaving us really guessing until the last minute as to why Jake Peralta was just fired from the precinct. The episode effortlessly wraps up so many first season story arcs and drops major hints to the show’s future, both in terms of character relationships and just unsuspectingly intricate the show’s plot becomes. It’s an exceptional first finale that puts a pin in the season without feeling rushed.
83. The Defense Rests
Season 2, Episode 14
Nazi Doctor Leo Spacemen, played by Chris Parnell in Tina Fey’s 30 Rock, is one of the most brilliant, twisted sitcom characters we’ve seen in the past decade. Here Parnell plays a borderline lawyer who crosses the border after being caught by Jake nose deep in some fine cocaine. While his manic comic book villain vibes are much better utilized in a future episode, it’s a great set up to a devastatingly funny character.
82. The Party
Season 1, Episode 16
Quite possibly the most Schurian character name in all of Brooklyn Nine-Nine is Kevin Cozner, played with measured aplomb by Marc Evan Jackson, is the perfect reveal for who Holt would be married to someone just like him. And it’s because of Kevin’s character that Holt’s mothers equal monotone doesn’t work as well because the joke is already played out so well with Jackson’s Kevin. The big twist of the episode is the reveal that Holt actually wanted the squad there to prove to Kevin, who has never seen eye to eye with Holt’s past squad’s thanks to #SystemicHomophobia, are actually good people. And while it may take them a while to prove Holt’s point, they do it in such a sweet way that the squad’s selflessness becomes a much-admired trope throughout the rest of the series. Also: Marilu Henner!
81. Det. Dave Majors
Season 2, Episode 21
Garrett Dillahunt may be one of our most unsung sitcom actors. From his turn as an OBGYN in The Mindy Project to his dumb, lovable father figure in future cult comedy Raising Hope. Here he plays grizzled badass Detective Dave Majors who has the hots for Amy, much to Jakes discomfort. But this episode continues to drive Cupid’s arrow through the hearts of Jake and Amy leading to their inevitable courtship. IT’S HAPPENING!
80. Undercover
Season 2, Episode 1
How do you come back from such a cliffhanger first season finale? Pick up exactly where you left off! It’s great fun seeing guido Jake as he has to reenter his mafioso double life, and even better when he’s paired with Michael Schur knockout Jenny Slate who seems to be born to play classless characters you can’t help but still love. What the top of Season 2 does best though is push the emotional storytelling to the surface, and while we can veritably predict where Jake and Amy’s relationship will be heading, it gives the showrunners the allowance to pursue more complex emotional storylines for all of their characters, like Holt’s anxiety about the new commissioner of the NYPD.
79. Jake and Sophia
Season 2, Episode 6
Eva Longoria is great in her run as Jake’s first real girlfriend on the show, Sophia. They allow her to eschew the typical cliches of “Women Who Like Guy Stuff” by being non-judgemental about how she loves the same action films as Jake and has no qualms over drinking ranch after eating spicy wings. They don’t try to make those traits a focus for Jake’s adoration for her, and they put it in complete contrast with his own personality by making Sophia a successful lawyer, a profession we discover is a cardinal sin for cops to date. She’s not only smartly written and strongly played but within her arc is given depth we don’t always get to see from periphery characters in other sitcoms.
78. Boyle-Linetti Wedding
Season 2, Episode 17
There’s so much to love in this episode! First Holt and his husband Kevin wanting to get remarried at the end is wholesome AF and a perfect example of the genuine moments of emotion that feel rare in sitcoms. Also, I love the Boyle extended family. They work because, while they air on the side of innocent and innocuous, they always feel one step away from embracing their inner Children of the Corn. I mean, who WOULDN’T want to see a scripted reality show based around them? Additionally, this episode just continues inching us ever so closer in Jake and Amy’s “Will they/Won’t they”. As Doug Judy would say “Just smoosh already!”
77. The Bank Job
Season 4, Episode 21
Continuing where “The Slaughterhouse” left off, ‘The Bank Job’ is all about setting us up to watch the hammer drop in the season four finale. Enlisting the help of Pimento, who is a highlight of every episode he’s in but especially after “accidentally” doing cocaine in front of Holt, Jake, and Rosa, the duo attempt to ingratiate themselves into Melanie Hawkin’s (Gina Gershon) gang by becoming dirty cops (and using Pimento as a punching bag). But what this episode also sets up for us is the fact that Gina is having a baby! While no doubt this storyline was written in to double Chelsea Peretti’s own pregnancy, it’s a great addition to Gina’s characters and really helps grow her own emotional maturity in unexpected ways.
76. Four Movements
Season 6, Episode 4
It’s the end of an era as Gina Linetti, masterfully played by Chelsea Peretti, bids Brookyln adieu. The movements of this title refers to the elaborate piece of dance theatre that Gina plans to perform for the squad in the episode’s cold open as a way to express her goodbyes. For a proper farewell, Gina plans to give each member of the squad a special “Gina Moment” ranging from a game of chess to a Yogurt of the Month club. While jokes do land – like when Gina denies Mario Lopez entry to her going away party– the whole of the episode feels rushed as they try and cram as much time in as they can with this series favorite character. The idea of Gina having personal interactions with each character could easily have been spread across two or even three episodes. But luckily, like the statue she gives the precinct, Gina won’t be gone for good, but her absence leaves a hole in the show that hasn’t quite been filled yet.
75. Tactical Village
Season 1, Episode 19
‘Tactical Village’ is probably the first “action episode” of the series but most importantly, it’s the first time we really start to see just how much Jake is growing attracted to Amy. The entire episode centers around a training exercise between other precincts where Jake meets Teddy, a future paramour of Amy’s that Jake becomes immediately jealous of. How do we know this? Because Jake drops his fun alter-ego’s and persona’s, taking the challenge head-on of beating the fastest time in completing the training. Jake has the emotional maturity of a 13-year-old, and this is the only way he can understand how to express his hurt over seeing Amy be courted by another man. But as Charles points out, Jake just needs to ask her.
74. Greg and Larry
Season 3, Episode 23
“Oh, Bob!” Holt says as his friend, who has been secretly working for mob boss Jimmy ‘The Butcher’ Figgis, holds him at gunpoint. That was the cliffhanger the last episode left us on, and it’s Holt’s fate that lies in the balance as Jake and the Squad try to track down where he’s taken him (hint: Holt left them clues thanks to a melting candy bar he’s forced to eat!). Something that I love about season finales of Brooklyn Nine-Nine is that they typically are more complex and intricate than your average episode. They layer the story arcs of the season together to not only give it a solid ending but also to reach out into what the next season will be. And in this case, it’s another marvelous cliffhanger. After taking down what they thought was a major crime network, Jake gets a mysterious call from Figgis threatening his and the Captain’s life. Flash cut to one month later as the camera pans up a dead-eyed pink flamingo with the text “Coral Palms, Florida” as a sandals-wearing Jake picks up a morning paper. “Hey Greg,” he calls to Captain Holt who is watering his lawn. “Morning Larry” as the camera pans up to reveal a series of cookie-cutter identical houses. It’s a great image to carry us into the three-part Season Four premiere.
73. Cheddar
Season 3, Episode 18
There’s something so endearingly authentic to Amy Santiago’s hilarious nervous obsessions. So while I may not be a binders kind of person like Amy is in this episode, I know people who love the click of those three rings snapping shut and the organizational powers that multi-color tabs have. This episode puts the spotlight on the adorable corgi Cheddar who Amy and Jake dog sit in a ploy to get Holt to visit his husband in Paris. Of course, they lose the dog and hijinks ensue but it’s all about the reason that Jake wanted to help The Captain that gives the episode it’s emotional core. Jake recognizes the need for strong, communicative relationships, and when he sees the strongest in his life (The Captain and his husband) begin to tear, he wants to support them. Remember y’all bros in the back: selflessly supporting someone is what we should always be doing!
72. The Slaughterhouse
Season 4, Episode 20
Gina Gershon as Lieutenant Melanie Hawkins may be the toughest, baddest cop the NYPD has. And it’s too damn bad that she’s working for the wrong side because Melanie Hawkins completely changes the lives of Rosa and especially Jake forever. But here in her debut, before her shadiness bubbles to the surface, she’s a figure of worship for the duo of cops. Jake because she’s clearly an action film character who loves Die Hard, but for Rosa, it’s more personal. While undoubtedly the world is full of ass-kicking women of law enforcement, their representation is sorely lacking. For Rosa, Melanie Hawkins is something to aspire to because she’s a woman who has fought through a patriarchal system and come out on top. Which is why it’s even more disheartening for Rosa to discover that Melanie Hawkins has been a crooked cop all along.
71. Bachelor/ette Party
Season 5, Episode 19
Boyle throws the most Boyliest Bachelor Party for his best bro Jake, along with Terry and Captain Holt. The only issue is, Boyle threw a party for himself, not for Jake, so while he would have loved a five-hour scavenger hunt across the borough, Jake just wanted to eat steaks and get drunk with his best framily (friends plus family equal framily!). To Boyle’s credit though? He did hire Die Hard’s Reginald VelJohnson as a part of this scavenger hunt, so Charles didn’t completely miss the target! Also: I love that Scully and Hitchcock dressed up as characters from Empire while attending Amy’s bachelorette party, namely because the joke is that they watch Empire, not that their costumes are racist. Remember this come Halloween everyone, while Scully and Hitchcock may be a little gross, even they understand that costumes should be representational and not racist!
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